For once, it’s not about McDonald’s. This time, it’s Subway that has been caught coming up short–by about an inch or so, that is. Thanks to some scrutinizing consumers, we’ve been made aware that those famous $5…$5…$5 footlongs are not measuring up. And they’re being sued for it.
Surprisingly enough, the litigant is not a woman.
Two men from New Jersey are calling the sandwich shop out, because apparently size DOES matter, and these men don’t appreciate the exaggeration in Subway’s advertising. They’re suing for compensatory damages. Their lawyer is seeking class-action status after claiming sandwiches from 17 shops were measured at less than the advertised foot. They want Subway to change their practices–either stop advertising the sandwich as a footlong or give us all that inch. The lawyer estimates that the missing bite equates to about 45 cents per sandwich.
Changing that jingle to $4.55…$4.55…$4.55 11-inch longs just doesn’t have the same ring to it now, does it?
The uproar started after an Australian teenager posted a photo of his 11-inch sub last week alongside a tape measure, on the Subway site on Facebook. He prompted Subway to respond. The photo has gone viral, and now others are posting similar images…all coming up short.
as posted by Matt Corby on Facebook
So I guess doing the “footlong” will follow the trend of ”planking” and we can expect tape measure sales to rise and measurement pictures to flood the web. I shudder to think of the sordid images that are going to be shared across social networks among all you sick people out there.
Anyway, Subway responded by stating that the sandwich in the image did not appear to be baked to their standards, although that comment has now been removed from their page. The official statement now is that the term “footlong” is a creative license thing, and should not be taken so literally as the sandwich’s actual size.
I’m guessing the Subway spokesmen are also men.
I’m pretty sure, though, that their advertising has included some literal references to the measurement of that foot. I can’t be alone, because their comments aren’t going over too well with consumers.
I have to wonder if it’s time to turn the focus back on Jared and that weight loss thing. Hey Subway, maybe you could spin this and state in your next commercial that Jared maintains his weight loss BECAUSE he’s not getting that last inch of sub. You’re doing us all a favor by saving us some calories. Yeah, that’s what it is–you’re helping us lose weight.
Think about that, and hire me to be your new public relations person. I’m available.
And personally, I think 11 inches is plenty. (Get those minds out of the gutter folks–I’m talking subs here!) I already feel bombarded this month with an overload of weight loss commercials, gym ads, The Biggest Loser, and the war on childhood obesity. While I may not be through packing on my winter pounds yet, I do find it surprising that now we have a news story of consumers demanding larger servings. And suing over it to boot.
I get it though. It’s a matter of principle. The lawyer states that this “is about holding companies to deliver what they’ve promised”. If you’re going to advertise a foot, you better realize that a foot is 12 inches, not 11, and you better deliver, or we’ll call you out. That inch makes a difference.
And now, as I write this, I think I may want in on this thing (unless Subway hires me as a PR person and then I must disclaim this all somehow). This lawsuit screams for a female litigant, if for no reason but the extra publicity and jokes that could pervade the web. And I could use some extra blog traffic so I’m willing to be a punchline.
In fact, I’d like to take on all these fast food places. I can be a consumer advocate. The Erin Brockovich of the food industry, if you will. I can see my name in lights as Jennifer Anniston wins her first Oscar for playing moi on the big screen.
I get a little carried away sometimes, I know.
I need a slightly different twist to my lawsuit, so I’m going to “protest” by eating at Subway tomorrow, with my tape measure in tow, so I can measure their 6-inch sub. Lord, help Subway if it comes up short at 5 inches.
I won’t stop there either, because I’m not sure Lay’s is putting enough chips in those bags.
And furthermore, I continue what’s now become a soapbox rant by warning all you food establishments that the next time I get a serving that does not resemble the images advertised on TV, the walls of your restaurant, or your menu board, I will be sharing a split-screen image across the world-wide web, so I can get pseudo-famous like this Australian teenager.
If your images show the Whopper appearing as an 6-inch tall burger, I will be less understanding than ever about receiving that sandwich as a 1-inch smashed replica of something you might have put out for your dog that was licked and then rejected.
You see, we all just want what we pay for, what we’re promised, what we expect. We don’t like to be short-changed. We don’t like to be ripped off. And we like to sue.
Size matters, dammit. (And that’s what SHE said.)
There is a sixth dimension beyond that which is comprehended by man. It is a dimension as vast as space yet as limited as one’s physical surroundings. A dimension not only of sight and sound, but of addiction, preoccupation, and mind control. It is the middle ground between reality and pseudo-interaction with global beings, between the world that man lives in and the virtual world in which man desires to exist. And it lies between the summit of his knowledge and the armpit of his limitations brought about by a cellular signal and data usage limits. You’re moving into a land of both substances and shadow, of physicality and vacuity. You’ve just crossed over into…the Cell Phone Zone.
